Yeah, you even sleep over sometimes
But we stay in our clothes
I’m only there so you’re not alone

And you say that I hurt you, in a voice like a prayer.

Yeah you say that I’ve hurt you, and your voice is like a prayer.

Yeah well maybe I hurt you sometimes, but let’s contrast and compare…

Lift up your shirt, the wound isn’t there

It's cool we can still be friends. 

I feel crushed

I should've expected this.

Do you know how it feels to be turned away by someone you're madly in love with? Do you know how it feels to be turned away after getting your hopes higher than the clouds? How about not seeing, touching, hearing that person's voice for six months...yeah I can promise you it's shit. It's like getting your heart broken all over again.

I fucking hate you...seriously 

I thought everything has been in my favor as of late, I was wrong. I was starting to feel happy again thinking that everything was falling back into place, but yesterday changed that all. I felt anxiety and suscpions again, I felt paranoia. I never wanted to feel this way again and now that I do, I'm angry. I never truly understood how it takes one person to turn your world until last week- at least I can say it was a nice week. 

Today I realized something. The idea of the life I'm supposed to have is just that, an idea. The life I saw for myself is full of unrealistic goals. The boy and the fairy tale life just aren't for me. The idea of love isn't for me. I'm not okay with that, but I do need to realize that that is the reality I face. It's the truth, it's my truth. 

I was fortunate enough to have love, unfortunate enough to lose it, unfortunate enough to not be able to keep it...but I will be fortunate enough to live a life when God is who I wake up to every day. 

Little do you know, I...

I love you 'till the sun dies