I just woke up crying. It sucks to feel this way with nowhere to turn. I feel I've exhausted everyone around me with these problems. I'm honestly so torn. I can't believe in one month I'll lose A for good. It sucks that he's leaving and we can't even say hi to each other. It sucks even more that I feel the way I do and those feelings can't be returned. It's breaking and draining. I finally realized how annoying it is to constantly accuse someone and jump to conclusions and even act on insecurities.